After a night in a hellish 1930s hostel I got back to the venue with minimal faff. It was going well. I made it to the cafe and met the mish mash of young and old. Grateful Phoenix at the bar with a smile. The first one I met was pax, a vaguely dude shaped Scotsman, who was either 14 or not as loved by puberty as I was expecting. It was warm. Wholesome almost.
We entered the "sexy vampire room" and sat in a circle, learning sensation via rope against skin. The black hemp rope was much softer than the other one. It tickled, not entirely a distraction but enough to make me escape some of the background noise in my brain. There was some questionable knot lessons (that I failed) and then a hushed cheese toastie break. During this break I met a mistress in a shiny necklace who seemed to embody a much more mumish energy to the kind I was expecting. Her name was mistress Susie and she was much more civilised than I expected.
I remembered a thing that was mentioned in passing last night, about the sessions being £100 per go. A "tribute". Maybe a side hustle for mum, I thought, aware that no one could clock me passing for either butch or domineering.
Of course after hearing all the horror stories I began to wonder if I was in too deep ... before really springy couple arrived. Mid 30s, not particularly kinky looking. "Its a second date" one of them admitted with a giggle. Bold move, I thought. But to their credit, their presence defused all the tension in the room. made me feel safe.
So the playfight session began, and I was paired for a warm up with Phoenix. Getting close enough to smell his aftershave in what was essentially competitive cuddling ... to start. It eventually escalated, each person having a different flavour, a different style. Some were goofy, some had a machismo rivalry, and some were borderline flirty. It was fascinating seeing peoples entire dynamics explained in a 10 minute scrap, people who'd never met before. I found out later that day, that Pheonix wasn't wearing aftershave. apparently my dry spell was much longer than i remembered.
So I completed that day, eating cheese toasties and listening to an 80s music mix with a dominatrix, a cutesy semi-hetronormative couple, a trans guy who looks about 14, his genderqueer master, and a completely zen German with a daft moustache!
that night i was walked to canal street and released. having been point blanc referred to as "ayyyyyyyyyyy Cardiff boy!" by a random stranger. it took me a solid 30 seconds to work out the welsh badge i was wearing. head above the waves, a mental health charity found near Cardiff. I never got to confirm that theory. she vanished before i could. i browsed the pubs before heading home, a box of chicken and chips in my arms, cradled like a child. i called it a night!
Day 3 crawled up. I didn't think I would come back, but they convinced me. So I went back to the dungeon. At this point I don't even associate it with its primary purpose, its just a gothy house to me now. There's an almost familial vibe with the main 5. Dragon as the cool older brother, Susie as the mum, and Phoenix as the dad.
This time around for the rope stuff, I was partnered with love dragon. This was doubly intense, partly because he chose to be topless and because he smelt palpably of pheromones and gruff manliness. I was then paired with Susie, and intimidated by her legacy, I began to second guess myself. My 3rd partner, Pax the trans guy, almost fell face first in a trance state. So all in all a success?
I also heard dragon, a tall German man with the voice of a hippie and the body of an otter in a kink bar, awkwardly stutter talking about the cleavage of an attendee. Starting off with "I'm super SUPER gay ... but I found it really interesting doing this task with a female bodied person with such cleavage" he stuttered, still graceful in awkwardness. His unusual combination of fascination and fear making Susie blush right into a fuscia colour scheme that matched the walls.
In the break between the events we chatted, and Pax was walked to the station. "I'm fed up of people who keep asking me questions about the event without reading the thingy" Phoenix ranted at me. I thinned my lip awkwardly, hadn't I done that? was this a weird critique? "I wouldn't say this in front of customers ... but you've been here all weekend so your part of the family now" he uttered bluntly... so I've been adopted by a German hippie, a dominatrix, a transgender puppy, and an awkward drama kid grown up. What is my life?
but joking aside i was strangely honoured. how did i feel comfortable skipping to nudity and wrestling with these people, hell to be considered part of their group. so much closer than i would be with my housemates or anyone else, yet only having met on the Friday, in a dark lane by an industrial estate.
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